This summer was b-u-s-y!!!

School ended, and we were here one week before leaving town. We spent a week in Maryland. We came home for a week and went to Orlando. We stayed there about a week and came back home. A week later, we left for Texas, Oklahoma, and Louisiana. We got back on a Wednesday, and poor Ethan started school Monday!!! We were home 2 weeks the whole summer . . . but we had a GREAT time!!!

Today was Ethan’s second day of school. We switched him to a private school this year. I know kindergarten is different than 1st grade, but every time I picked him up last year and asked him what they did, he would answer, “Recess, lunch, PE, more recess, and snack!!” The first day at this school, I asked him what he did, and he said in a huff, “Work, and a lot of it!!” LOL I told him that’s what we’re paying for . . . hehe. I think hope he will be much happier at this school. Unfortunately, it’s not a free ride like last year was. He actually has to work now . . . He is not excited about school, however. He would rather stay home with mommy (according to him!!!).

Emily is so excited to see Ethan when we pick him up. And I’m LOVING the quiet and lack of constant battle and bickering at the house. Today, Emily said, “Bubba, I’m so proud of you for going to school!!!” LOL . . . Emily is officially potty trained. She wears a diaper to bed, but she’s in undies the rest of the day . . . even out!! Anyway, I’ve been telling her how proud I am of her using the potty and such. So she decided to be proud of Ethan!!! Of course, she told me she was proud of me for going potty like a big girl, too.

Really, I came on here to post some meteor stuff to keep track of. Seems that this isn’t a good year for the Perseid shower because the moon is bright, not to mention it’s cloudy here tonight!! But there will be a few more this year – Orionids (October 21), the Leonids (November 17), and the Geminids (December 14). Ethan was looking forward to the meteor shower tonight as was I. Hopefully one of these others will be better!!!

Oh, on a TTC note . . . still in a holding pattern. I had laproscopic surgery in June. Tubes are not blocked, and everything looks great. Looks like September will be the next month we will do more with the RE. Not sure what that entails . . . clomid and ultrasounds or whatever.

I have to go to bed. That 6am alarm clock comes mighty early!!!

So I found a pirate cruise and told Ethan about it. I showed him the website and asked if he wanted to do it. He said no. I was confused . . . thinking how much they would both enjoy it!! So I told him that he could watch the dolphins, find treasure, and other pirate games, maybe even walk the plank!! He kept shaking his head, his eyes were big, and he was saying that he didn’t want to do it. I’m still lost . . . the pics look cool!!!

Then I said, “Ethan, you do know these aren’t REAL pirates, right? It’s not a real pirate ship. They painted it to look like one, and the people just dress up.” He looked at me and said that he didn’t know that!!! LOL Poor kid . . . he thought it was a real pirate ship, and sailing with real pirates didn’t thrill him!!! After the explanation and reading some reviews from parents, he decided it would be fun. But he did say, “Mom, I am NOT walking the plank!!!”

Emily is great. She’s been fighting a slight cough and runny nose, but I think (hope) it’s already on the mend.

I called my RE. Preliminary reports were correct . . . blocked tube. Now we wait until the first week of June for my next appointment to talk about what to do next. I’ve done some research . . . bad google!!! Seems that something with a blocked tube can keep a fertilized egg (from the other tube) from even implanting. So many docs either try to open the blocked tube or remove it all together. sigh . . . I’m wondering how I ever got pregnant with the two kiddo’s I have!! I always call my kids my little miracles, and that seems to be more fitting now . . .

Ethan only has one more week of school!! Then we’ll have a fun filled summer of swimming lessons, soccer camp, and vacations! We are going to Orlando and Texas in July. We will be BUSY!!!

Kevin is finally getting all his paperwork turned in for retirement!! The kids and I should be moving next summer (hopefully to Texas), and Kevin should be retired by October!! Pray that he finds a GREAT job in Ft. Worth!!! Ethan said that we are moving to Texas, with or without daddy!!! LOL He even calls himself a Texan . . . even though he was born in New York. That’s my little man . . .

Even with my current RE, I brought up the HSG because he was talking about the possibility of IUI or IVF in the future. I told him that if we have to pay for these procedures out of pocket, I want to make sure everything is clear. He said he agreed, but he also felt (just as I did) like it was just another test to do just to mark the blocks, cover our bases. No one expected a problem . . .

Well, I suppose they can be wrong.

Preliminary reports show that my right tube is blocked. This is heartbreaking news to me. You only ovulate out of one side each month, and even if a tube is blocked, an egg still releases (it just has no place to go). You never know what side you will ovulate from. It just randomly happens. So this is not good news at all. I just got diagnosed with PCOS . . . that hinders our efforts. Now this?? Are you kidding me?? I’m scared to say what’s next . . .

I have a few more tests coming up this month. Hopefully the rest of them will bring me GOOD news.

My RE suggested a high protein/low to no carb diet, but that’s just hard!!!

So I’m doing my own. I am doing a juice fast for both detox and weight loss. At first, I’m going to juice breakfast and possibly lunch and have a sensible dinner. Then, after we get back from the in-laws this weekend, I’ll do a full fast for . . . probably 2 days to start. I would like to eventually do a 30 day juice fast. Everything I have read said to start slow. So I can’t jump into that yet . . . not that I have that kind of willpower!!!!

Breakfast was blueberries, mangoes, peaches, strawberries, spinach, and whey protein (in blender).

Lunch was . . . 1/2 hamburger and fries . . . see, ZERO willpower!!!

Dinner will be Subway because Ethan has a soccer game. That’s fairly sensible . . .

Wish me luck . . .

So here I sit . . . staring at the screen . . .

Maybe I’ll post more tomorrow!!!!!

Afterward, I started thinking. Do my kids get the best of me? Does my husband?
I wondered what their letters would say.

I am snippy when I shouldn’t be. I cry over spilled milk. I have said (more than once), “Give me a minute. I’m on the computer” or “Let me finish cleaning the kitchen” or “I’m almost done with my paper” or “I’m watching this show.” There are so many things racing through my mind. Times when I should have stopped what I was doing and gave them my full attention. Times when I should have been more caring and understanding instead of upset that their actions gave me more work. Times when I should have sat down and played the board game for the 50th time or read a book for the 100th time. Times when I should just hold them and rock them until they fall asleep instead of trying to “train them” to sleep on their own, all night long.

The old saying, no one ever says they wish they worked more rings true. I need to slow down. I need to focus on my family. I need to push aside things that don’t matter because . . . really, this is it. This is the only shot I get . . . and I know that I’m going to miss this . . .  every last second . . .